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The Pros and Cons of a ‘Married at First Sight’ Marriage

Have you seen the show Married at First Sight yet? I think I’m a little in love with it. In short, singles who are sick of the dating scene and ready for marriage let three experts find someone for them. The kicker? They meet their wife or husband-to-be for the very first time on their wedding day.

Now, some people might say this is insane. I mean, how could you let someone else be so in charge of something so important? Where is the romance? Isn’t it better to wait for that “zing” you feel when you do finally stumble upon Miss or Mister Right, rather than rely on questionnaires and interviews and matchmakers to take a more clinical approach?

I found my husband the old fashioned way (we met at work), and we knew immediately that we’d each found the person we were going marry. But then we waited almost four more years before actually doing so. It’s been over 17 years since then, and I still wonder: Wouldn’t we still be as happily married as we are now if we had the wedding right then instead of years later? What was the point of all that time in between?

In my case, we kept having friends and family flat-out tell us we were crazy not to rush. In many of these Married at First Sight cases, their friends and families flat-out tell them they are crazy to rush.

But who’s right? Let’s run through the Pros vs. Cons, shall we?

Pros

  • How many of us get reminded on the regular by our BFFs of how terrible each person on our list of exes is? Having professionals slap our knuckles so we stop picking bad apples and let them choose the perfect match is kind of logical, when you think about it.
  • Wedding planning can nearly break a person (or at least, make her want to strangle her most beloved relatives). Having cameras (i.e. witnesses) around for a quickie ceremony can cut the drama in half.
  • If you’ve never kissed a stranger before, now’s your chance to cross that one off the bucket list!
  • There is no doubt that you both went into this knowing you are 100% committed to making this marriage last, and are willing to do the work needed. That sounds like great footing on which to start a forever together.
  • You don’t have to go through that painful stage of holding in farts near your partner, because once you’re married everything can be out in the open. (Right?)
  • You can also skip the sexy thong stage and go right to the FAR more comfortable Married Lady Granny Panty stage. Ahhh …
  • You plan your wedding with such little lead time that you can make absolutely sure you won’t have your period on your honeymoon. (Woohoo!)
  • If you’ve never been on a blind date before, this is pretty much the most AMAZING one you could possible have. Go big or go home, amiright?

Cons

  • What if he’s the kind of person who claps when a plane lands, or sloppily slurps soup? You won’t know this until it’s too late.
  • Your sister has the best BS radar that has ever existed, and you won’t get a chance to run the dude past her, first.
  • OMG WHAT IF HE’S A BAD KISSER?
  • “The pros figured there was a low chance of us getting divorced” isn’t exactly the most romantic engagement story to ever tell one’s grandkids.
  • Being wooed by someone who wants to make really really really sure you’ll eventually accept his proposal is a lot of fun, and you won’t get that.
  • There’s very little chance of wedding night sex.
  • Also, there’s very little chance of honeymoon sex.
  • Grandma’s gonna keep saying, “I just don’t understand why you kids did it like this” at every family gathering for the rest of her long, long, LONG life.

Hmmm … looking at this list, it feels like the “cons” can all be overcome, and it just might be worth the risk. I mean, if the odds are stacked in your favor — and you’re willing to do the work to ensure the relationship remains fulfilling — why put off the inevitable?

Set your DVRS — Season 5 of Married at First Sight premieres Thursday, April 20 at 9/8 Central on Lifetime. You can also watch from the very beginning on MyLifetime.com now.

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