Here at Family Style, we have seen it all. And I mean all. Of course we typically prefer to feature those must-have products that changed our lives, genius new ideas and jaw-dropping designs, but there are also baby products that make us say stop and say, Get outta here.
From funny to useless to plain old creepy, here are the 10 most ridiculous baby products we’ve seen for infants and toddlers:
We’re going to overlook the fact that infant positioners are thought to be a SIDS risk for a minute, because that’s not your first thought when you see the above picture, right? Your first thought is creepy. Or possibly future therapy. Because while your baby thinks mom is (awkwardly) cradling him, it’s actually a pair of fake disembodied hands. (Note: The idea behind the Zaky is sweet. But it only goes so far.)
2. 2011 Little Mommy Doll
The only thing creepier than fake hands holding your baby is watching her interact with this life-like doll. See why this Little Mommy doll gives us chills up our spine.
3. The Pee pee Teepee
Ok, confession: I have used these Pee Pee Teepee. In my sleep-deprived, totally-clueless, tired-of-being-peed-on days of motherhood, I thought sure, a piece of cone-shaped fabric should solve my problems. Until that piece of fabric shot straight across the room with a stream of urine behind it.
4. Baby Helmets like Thudguard and Bumper Bonnet
Golly, how did we all make it to adulthood without a protective shield around our brains? Oh right, it’s called a skull.
5. Babykeeper Basics
Oh for the love of God.
8. Baby Knee Pads
Overprotective parents, we’re looking at you — again. Who knew developing was so hazardous? Then again, how would you like to crawl around on hard floors all day? Wouldn’t that kill your kneecaps? Wait a — aren’t babies born without kneecaps? Just a fleshy, cushioned (padded, if you will) area designed for…wait for it…crawling? Another point for the human body.
7. Father-Daughter Dance Shoes
At first we thought this was just about the cutest thing we’ve seen — a pair of shoes for you and your toddler! Shoes joined at the feet! Dancing shoes! But would you ever spend $132 (+ shipping) on something that people have been doing for decades for free? Cute, yes. Heartwarming, yes. Ridiculous? Yes.
8. The Baby Mop
If they’re going to crawl around as it is, wreaking havoc, they might as well pitch in with the housework. Child labor, you say? We call it chores. See a video for The Baby Mop at The Huffington Post. (P.S. we don’t think this is actually a real product, but we honestly wouldn’t be surprised.)
9. Toddler Tracker
I almost always lose my keys, my cell phone, my shoes, sometimes even my entire pocket book. Can’t say I’ve ever thought Man, I wish I had a beeper to find that toddler!
10. Baby Bottom Fan
Not only does this fan speed up the drying process during diapering (because we all know how torturous that can be), it also sprays aromatherapy fragrance. Just don’t forget your Pee Pee Teepee or you’ll have a lot more to dry.
**Next up: The Top 10 Most Ridiculous Parenting Products for moms and dads. We found some doozies.
Also check out:
*Top 10 Most Inappropriate Kids Gifts Ever: infant high heels, pole dancing dolls and STD toys.
*The Worst Kids Toys of 2011: Yes, these are really hitting the shelves.
* Top 10 Funniest iPad Cases: Retro TVs, sanitary napkins and bacon.