11 Moms Share Their Dirty Little Housekeeping Secrets

Image source: Thinkstock
Image source: Thinkstock

A parent’s day-to-day life is filled with chaos, messes, screams, laughter, baths, errands, and never-ending “To Do” lists.

You have to make sure your child is fed, clean, and relatively happy and healthy. You have to sign permission slips, take the kids to school and activities, arrange play dates, go to the grocery store (or as my kids call it, the all-you-can-eat buffet), and maybe somewhere in the midst of it all, you try to carve out just a few seconds of time for just you before the sun comes up the next day.

With all of that going on 365 days of the year, something has to be pushed aside to make time for everything else. And if you’re like me, that “thing” is housekeeping.

It’s not like we live in filth and squalor, but I’ll admit that keeping my home clean is not my forte. It wasn’t before I had kids either, so I can’t really use it as an excuse — but I do.

Lucky for me, I did some research and discovered I’m not the only mom who sucks at housekeeping. These ladies were kind enough to share their dirtiest housekeeping secrets with me and with all of you, so stop thinking about how you need to clean the toilet and find solace in the fact that you are not alone.

“When my MIL stops by unannounced I hide my dirty dishes in the oven and shove the laundry in my office!” – Sarah Cottrell, Housewife Plus

“If we have company coming over, I only clean the ‘shiny stuff’ in the bathroom- the fixtures, mirror, etc. and that’s usually done with a baby wipe because I use those for nearly every cleaning occasion from kid’s asses to dusting our flat screen. Those mofos are wonderfully versatile.” – Tara Woods, Love Morning Wood

“I NEVER separate my laundry! Also, you’re at major risk for an avalanche if you open certain cabinets in my house (like the one I keep my kitchen stuff in. Oy).” – Rita Templeton, Fighting Off Frumpy

“I don’t clean my shower…ever.” – Harmony Hobbs, Modern Mommy Madness

“I never dust. Like, ever. And if I happen to accidentally dust something while moving things around, I half-ass finish the job with my shirt sleeve.” – Jessica D’Pirate, Domestic Pirate

“I sprinkle Comet into the tub and let the next person who showers deal with cleaning it.” – Jennifer Scharf

“I don’t pick up toys. I just sweep them into a corner, and I tell my kids that any toys left in the pile after 15 minutes are going in the trash. Then I get out a plastic trash bag and sit down.” – Sage K. Penn

“You could probably feed a family of 5 for a week with what’s under my couch cushions.” – Joelle Wisler, Running From Mountain Lions

“This is really, really disgusting, but I know my cats have puked under our bed, and I’m just too grossed out (and claustrophobic) to crawl under there and take care of it.” – Mommy Catharsis, Contemplative Chaos

“I have one rule I live by regarding cleaning my home, ‘If you can’t smell it, it didn’t happen.'” – Elly Lonon, BugginWord

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