8 Things You Should Not Say to Parents With Kids Who Are Close in Age

Not that long ago my household was crazy — I had three kids who were only 3.5 years apart and when we would go out we would get some interesting looks and some strange comments.

People assume that they were not “planned,” that we just “got pregnant,” and anyone who knows my pregnancy history would know that is not the case with us — I wish we could just accidentally get pregnant. Our kids were all very much planned and so were their age differences, as much as we could (we tried to have them closer in age).

Speed and Raru are 14 months apart and then Raru & Bean are 2 years apart. I preferred the closer-in-age gap, and as we plan for baby # 4, I worry about the 3+ year age difference there will be between them.

I can recognize that we are not really the norm as far as family planning and the age gap goes. I have chatted with many people who find that their personal age gap preference is 2+ years, however there are still some things you should never assume or say to us.

Click through to read the 8 things you should never say to parents with kids close in age:

  • “Which one was the ‘oopsie'” 1 of 8
    "Which one was the 'oopsie'"
    There is this idea that if your kids are close in age, one must have been a 'mistake'. You should never assume that & you should especially never ask.
    Photo credit: photostock
  • “Your poor body” 2 of 8
    "Your poor body"
    Oh, right. My poor body which grew healthy kids. Not nice to "pitty" someone.
    Photo credit: photostock
  • “Have you heard of birth control” 3 of 8
    "Have you heard of birth control"
    Just rude. There is nothing wrong with wanting kids close in age.
    Photo credit: photostock
  • “You’re a baby machine” 4 of 8
    "You're a baby machine"
    This shouldn't be said to anyone because really, it's usually always said with snark.
    Photo credit: photostock
  • “You are always pregnant” 5 of 8
    "You are always pregnant"
    Like it's a bad thing?
    Photo credit: photostock
  • “Your kids are going to constantly fight” 6 of 8
    "Your kids are going to constantly fight"
    It really isn't the age that makes the closeness, it's the family.
    Photo credit: photostock
  • “I’m glad I got the special time with my kids” 7 of 8
    "I'm glad I got the special time with my kids"
    Implying that we missed out on something because our kids are close in age is so wrong. I didn't miss out on anything.
    Photo credit: photostock
  • “Did you want them that close?” 8 of 8
    "Did you want them that close?"
    There are some questions that should just not be asked outright. This is one because it assumes you didn't.
    Photo credit: photostock

:: How close in age are your kids? ::

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Photo credit: modified from photostock

Article Posted 4 years Ago

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