In Which We Band Together to Discuss Playdate Difficulties

Most of us are strangers here, so let’s be honest, is your kid a bigger jerk when a playdate is held on their own turf?

I’m not saying my kid is a jerk, but she has far more difficulties when playdates are at our house rather than at the houses of her friends. Or all of her friends’ moms lie to me about how good she was at their house. I will admit that things have gotten better as far as dispute resolution since she began school, but there is still the issue of “SHE WON’T PLAY WITH ME!” or “HE DOESN’T WANT TO PLAY WHAT I WANT TO PLAY!”

I worried it was an only child thing for awhile but now I’m beginning to think it really is that having friends over to play with your toys is simply a harder concept to deal with.

Here’s my other confession, it makes me happy to see your kids be jerks on their home turf, not because you have naughty kids and I don’t, but because I’m not the only one.

I know for a fact Addie has a fine set of manners in place. I also know the situations in which those manners tend to slip.

Today she had a friend over from her class and for awhile things just seemed, bumpy. Addie had it all planned out what she wanted to do with this friend, however the friend wanted to play with the cats and basically everything Addie hadn’t planned on playing with. I interrupted as little as possible and forced her to come up with her own resolutions and I was really happy when I heard her using phrases like “Can we please work this out?” or “Can we please find something we both want to do?” Eventually they settled on playing with balloons and pretending to be puppies but for awhile I worried I’d have to coax Addie out of a corner from all the pouting.

Since it is winter break I want her to enjoy herself rather than being stuck staring at the baby and me all day so I’ve been trying to keep her busy.

When it comes to playdates there’s just so many variables. She seems to do much better playing with boys, younger girls or friends she’s had for a really long time. But I know all too well the importance of learning to play with everyone and working through difficulties with new friends, even if the difficulties consist of ponies vs. coloring.

How do playdates work around your house?


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Article Posted 5 years Ago

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