Any Trick -or- Treater knows the drill. You walk up to the discouragingly dark house and knock on the door. After a painfully long pause the door opens revealing either an old woman who didn’t realize it’s Halloween or the middle aged couple who turned out every light in the hopes no one would knock. But now you’ve got them cornered, you little ghoul, with your goodie bag outstretched. You’ve forced confused grandma or the antisocial neighbors to improvise. And this is what happens:
Bad Goodie #1 condiments
What kid doesn’t want a fistful of soy sauce packets from take out for Halloween? Let’s hope the next house has fried dumplings.
Bad Goodie #2 Dog Food
Hey, a doggie buscuit looks like a cookie, right?
Bad Goodie #3 Religious Literature
Happy Halloween, here’s why you’re going to hell, you little pagaen.
Bad Goodie #4 Random Food
From raw onions to frozen dinners, this is the most desperate kind of handout.
Bad Goodie #5 Toiletries
Somebody been steeling the little soiaps and shampoos from hotels, hmmm?
Bad Goodie #6 Odds and Ends
Batteries, paperclips, AOL software CDs. Pretty much the entire contents of the home owners junk drawer.
Bad Goodie #7 Super Inappropriate Items
Yes, some people hand out fireworks and beer. Happy Halloween you drunk, no-fingered tot!
Source: Reader’s Digest