Awesomely Awkward and Just Plain Awful Christmas Cards

Hope you have the breast Christmas ever!

I don’t know what it says about me that I could easily spend three or four hours surfing the net for the best of the worst Christmas Cards you’ve ever seen but there you are.

I delight in the awkwardness of others. There, I said it. I do.

Perhaps it makes me feel better about myself or maybe these awkward holiday cards are so awesome that you can’t help but get sucked in. But listen, there is a specific talent to viewing holiday cards. That’s right, I said a talent to viewing holiday cards.

You can’t just look at a photo and move on, no. You have to go deeper. You have to use your imagination in order to think about the conversations that took place as these people planned these particular photos.

For example: You areĀ  beholding a wonderfully awkward photo of a couple in matching sweaters holding their cats. Do you just grin and move on? Nay. In your mind’s eye, picture the discussion that went down as they prepared for the photo…

MOM: “We’re going to wear our matching sweaters, you know, the powder blue ones with the beautiful nativity scene motifs on the front?
DAD: Uh-huh. So far so great!
MOM: And then, AND THEN, we are going to hold our cats, Sheila and Juju, and we are going to pretend like they are the baby Jesus. IT’S GOING TO BE AWESOME!”
DAD: That sounds awesome! Let’s do it! Maybe, just maybe, we can super-impose photos of our hamsters around the edges of the card? In The Photoshop? Do you think it would work? Or hey! What about grandpa’s buck he got taxidermied last year?
MOM: You just blew my mind.

So please, as you delight in each photo you’re about to see, imagine, if you will, the back story. The planning and preparation that went into these photos. And that, my friends, is the way you should properly view a Holiday Card photo.

  • On Dasher, On Dancer! 1 of 21
    On Dasher, On Dancer!
    This card was totally the guy in red's idea, right? He's just a little too stoked. And Rudolph looks pissed.
    Photo Credit:
  • Merry Christmas From The Johnsons 2 of 21
    Merry Christmas From The Johnsons
    You just shut your judgmental mouth! This card is filled with more holiday cheer than you muster all season long!
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  • Wardrobe Malfunction 3 of 21
    Wardrobe Malfunction
    I cannot even begin to count the awesome here. No seriously. I can't. I'm too focused on the impending malfunction.
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  • Merry Christmas Aunt Edna! 4 of 21
    Merry Christmas Aunt Edna!
    Just what everyone wants to hang on their wall during the holidays, amirite?
    Photo Credit: pophangover.comawkwardfamilyphotos
  • It’s Jammer Time 5 of 21
    It's Jammer Time
    Just the cutest family ever, right? I'm terrified.
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  • Just Your Average Cheetah Attacking An Antelope Holiday Card 6 of 21
    Just Your Average Cheetah Attacking An Antelope Holiday Card
    Nothing to ignite the holiday spirit like bloodshed, who's with me?!
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  • Just Hanging Around In The Snow 7 of 21
    Just Hanging Around In The Snow
    Seriously you guys. This is totally candid. This is how we start every day.
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  • More Santa Paws 8 of 21
    More Santa Paws
    Is this for the animal shelter? I don't care. I want one in my mailbox, like, yesterday.
    Photo Credit:
  • What The? 9 of 21
    What The?
    My brain doesn't know how to process what it's seeing right now.
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  • Merry Kissmas 10 of 21
    Merry Kissmas
    Because, you know - the family that dresses like kiss together... Looks ridiculous.
    Photo Credit:
  • ?????? 11 of 21
    I just... I don't... Um... What?
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  • Merry Khristmas! (In 3D) 12 of 21
    Merry Khristmas! (In 3D)
    This isn't your traditional awkward Christmas card but I can't even begin to count the awkward here. Send me a sweatered dork holding a creepy cat over this any day of the week. Kim Kardashian actually tweeted this card with the addendum "And there's a special 3D version that you can view in 3D glasses!" Because that's what I need. Her ass in 3D.
    Photo Credit:
  • A Doggone Shame, Is What This Is 13 of 21
    A Doggone Shame, Is What This Is
    This has to be illegal, right? Unless this family is royalty in some crazy country or something and then fine, okay. 50 dogs for everyone!
    Photo Credit:
  • Santa Paws 14 of 21
    Santa Paws
    I so wish I was in the discussions about preparing this holiday card. "And our faces are going to be on cat bodies. IT WILL BE AWESOME." Awesome, indeed.
    Photo Credit:
  • From Their House To Yours 15 of 21
    From Their House To Yours
    Dig the cleavage, mama.
    Photo Credit:
  • Santa Is Freaking 16 of 21
    Santa Is Freaking
    Yes. Yes! I'll bring you the new Black Sabbath CD, whatever you want, now just go!
    Photo Credit:
  • So Bad It’s Good 17 of 21
    So Bad It's Good
    Cats = awesomely awkward holiday card. Every time.
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  • Bad To The Bone 18 of 21
    Bad To The Bone
    For some reason I picture this dad being like the dad on Modern Family. See, I told you I have a talent for viewing Christmas cards.
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  • Deck The Hogs 19 of 21
    Deck The Hogs
    The pigs love this! We do it every year before we butcher them for Christmas dinner!
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  • Matchy McMatchersons 20 of 21
    Matchy McMatchersons
    Totally tame in comparison to what else has been going down in the hearts and minds of other folks formulating their Christmas card plan.
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  • Your Baby Is… Breathtaking 21 of 21
    Your Baby Is... Breathtaking
    Points for having a sense of humor but this is terrifying.
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Article Posted 4 years Ago

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