Baby's First Taser For Playground Brawls?

my-first-tazzrThe next time you hear a kid on the playground screaming “don’t tase me, bro,” you might want to come running. Because now Kid Fun’s got a “Tazzr” just for them.

My First Tazzr promises your kid can subdue another within 2.1 seconds, ensuring their reign as king or queen of the playground. 

Because really, should Mommy and Daddy always be coming in with their guns blazing just because that pain in the ass kid from down the street won’t share their stupid blue blankie? It’s called sharing kid, who cares if you’re 2 and autistic? Sheesh.

OK, before you start freaking out, the tazzr is an elaborate joke played by one of Babble’s favorite toy stores. Olie Bollen put the tazzr up with a warning “Not suitable for children of any age. Use your words instead.”

But in a week that featured cops tasing a ten-year-old, we can’t blame you for that bit of eye-popping rage. And if you were attracted to the idea, Olie Bollen has an e-mail where you can apply for purchase . . . and they’ll pass your information on the Child Protective Services gratis.

Did you have a freak out moment there?

Image: Olie Bollen

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Article Posted 7 years Ago

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