Do Not Buy Dad Socks For Father's Day

Black Socks for Dad? Um, no.Of all the things you can get for dad on Father’s Day, I hope that “socks” are not even on your list. They certainly aren’t on his.

But this press release we received thinks that’s crazy. Crazy!

Here you go:

Breakfast in bed?  What about socks on a platter? has launched its innovative “Sockscription” service in the U.S., just in time to give Dad the gift that keeps on giving….
After 10 successful years in Europe and one million pairs of socks sold, it’s time America’s feet reap the same benefits.

But wait! There’s more! This is from

SOCKSCRIPTION™.  There is no easier way to deal with your sock sorrows.

Sock sorrows? That sounds like the name of a rejected Sesame Street sketch.

More enjoyment can be had from the title of the page:

Black socks – Buy socks in the definitely correct colour for men.

What does that mean? That men should only wear black socks? Even with sneakers? Ever see a guy in Chuck Taylors with black socks? Did you think that was the “correct” color?

The concept isn’t that horrible, I suppose. You give the company $89/year and they send you socks every few months. Personally, I don’t go through socks that quickly, but then again, I work at home and nobody really cares what I look like during the day. (As opposed to at night, when I go out and fight crime. No I don’t.) But even if I did require frequent refreshment of my sock drawer, I wouldn’t want this for Father’s Day. In fact, as I said over at my own site, I’d rather not get anything. I don’t mean that in a “that’s OK, don’t change the lightbulb, I’ll just sit in the dark.” It’s just that I don’t see the point of buying a gift just for the sake of buying a gift, especially if said gift is as dumb as A SOCKSCRIPTION. Excuse me, I mean SOCKSCRIPTION™.

Anyway, let’s not belabor the point. Don’t buy dad socks for Father’s Day. This public service announcement was brought to you by The Committee To Stop Giving Dopey Gifts. And I approve this message.


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