The 7 Lamest Parenting Inventions of All Time

Mad scientist
All parents should really be consulted before some products are made available

Sure, there are folks out there who were clever enough to invent things like baby monitors with an OFF button, and Benadryl.

But then there were people who inexplicably thought they had good ideas that have turned out to be the bane of parenting.

Take a look at the very worst parenting inventions ever:



  • Mr. Potato Head (and the Missus) 1 of 7
    Mr. Potato Head (and the Missus)
    I'm not sure how a starchy, tuberous crop made its way onto toy shelves once upon a time, or how it has managed to maintain its popularity for nearly 60 years. Have you ever tried to get the glasses to stay on the ears? Or the feet to stay in place? Or the earrings to stay on Mrs. Potato Head's ears? Have you watched your daughter try to get the purse around her own wrist? And then have you seen what happens when she can't? I have. It's not fun. And then have you stepped on the pieces that get thrown about your house in frustration? I have. It's not fun.
  • Flammable Pajamas 2 of 7
    Flammable Pajamas
    If they make non-flammable pajamas, why do they possibly make flammable ones, too? My family lives in a cold climate and yet we can think of endless ways to keep our kids warm besides pajamas that have the potential to catch on fire.
  • Matching Clothes for Parents and Children 3 of 7
    Matching Clothes for Parents and Children
    So in this scenario, are the kids supposed to look like the grown ups or are the grown ups supposed to look like the kids? Which is better? Is one or both scenario supposed to be cute? Really?
  • Rectal Thermometers 4 of 7
    Rectal Thermometers
    If you need to take your kid's temperature to such an exact degree that you need to torture your child with something up their butt, why not skip the painful step and just go directly to the doctor instead — I mean, clearly your kid is sick. I'm not sure if taking a baby's temperature through the back door is worse for the baby or the parent, but do you really want to argue about it?
  • Leashes for Children 5 of 7
    Leashes for Children
    If your kids are that bad — or you are such a bad/inattentive/ineffective parent — that you need to stick a leash on them, it might be time to have yourself or your kid evaluated. PS The leashes with the teddy bears or the monkeys on your kid's back don't make the whole thing any less pathetic on any level.
  • Portable Potties 6 of 7
    Portable Potties
    Who, exactly, is cleaning out the potty? Why not just stick a special seat on the actual toilet so the kid doesn't fall in? Besides, what are they learning, exactly, by getting to sit on a special seat whenever they want? Won't you then have to train them again to use a permanent potty? And did I already ask who has to clean it out? Because, who exactly, has to clean it out? Eww. Yuck. Gross.
  • Po-Knee 7 of 7
    Is it that you don't trust yourself to play the part of a horse in a convincing enough fashion? Or are you worried that your child's imagination is inadequate? Either way, take that thing off your knee, stick your kid on it and just neigh. It's not that tough.


Images: Creative Commons

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There are bad inventions, then there’s bad parenting: May 2011 Top Parenting Scandals!

Article Posted 5 years Ago

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