The Do’s and Don’ts of Helping a Friend Through a Breakup

Your friend just got dumped and it was ugly-bad.

You never liked him anyway, right? The problem is, she did. A lot. And between shoveled mouthfuls of Häagen-Dazs she’s shares her plans to adopt half a dozen stray cats so she won’t have to die alone.

What’s a bestie to do? Before you push her into rebound sex or watch The Notebook one more time, consider these do’s and don’ts of helping a friend through a breakup.

  • Do let her mourn 1 of 12
    Do let her mourn
    She planned on having 100 babies and growing old with this douchebag. Allow her time to grieve.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Don’t let her… 2 of 12
    Don't let her...
    ...cut her hair, get a tattoo, or sleep with some random dude. Just don't.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Do join the pity party 3 of 12
    Do join the pity party
    You haven't seen this much junk food since cramming for finals in college. Good friends join in the pig out pity party and vow to lose the weight together...someday.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Don’t offer advice or speak in clichés 4 of 12
    Don't offer advice or speak in clichés
    Unless you're specifically asked for your advice (and even then I'd be really careful), keep your advice and opinions to yourself. And please, avoid the "Plenty of fish in the sea/It wasn't meant to be/True love finds a way" BS.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Do draw a line in the sand 5 of 12
    Do draw a line in the sand
    As much as your friend needs you and you want to be there for her, don't offer so much of yourself that your own relationship begins to suffer.
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  • Don’t contact him 6 of 12
    Don't contact him
    I repeat, DO NOT contact him. Even if she begs you through ugly cry puppy dog eyes, refuse to get in the middle of their relationship.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Don’t talk bad about him 7 of 12
    Don't talk bad about him
    It's the hardest thing in the world to watch your friend get treated badly and dumped via Facebook status change. Even if you'll never forgive him, she might. Do you really want to be the person who called her friend's future husband a dickhead?
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Do bring wine 8 of 12
    Do bring wine
    Bring whatever wineage you've got on hand, STAT! No time for a visit to the liquor store, she needs you now!
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Don’t set her up on a date… 9 of 12
    Don't set her up on a date...
    ...either deliberately or otherwise. She'll rebound when she's good and ready.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Do be there 10 of 12
    Do be there
    Be there for that 2 a.m. call or that work function she can't bear to attend alone. There's safety and sanity in numbers.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Don’t attempt to fix it 11 of 12
    Don't attempt to fix it
    You can't change the past or rewrite the future so don't even try.
    Image credit: Shutterstock
  • Do rally the troops for fun 12 of 12
    Do rally the troops for fun
    No matter how good it feels to wallow in cheap wine and sad movies, it never once healed a broken heart. Round up your friends and engage in a healthy distraction from heartache woes. The wine and Ryan Gosling will still be there when she gets back.
    Image credit: Shutterstock

How do you go about helping a friend through a breakup?


Article Posted 4 years Ago

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