Don’t you think it’s strange how choosing to be child-free is somehow considered this epic choice in life? Really, it’s just choosing to continue on as you are without adding the ultimate, expensive, life-altering chaos that having kids brings to the mix. At the same time having kids is considered the natural, expected thing to do even though we parents totally know kids completely jack up your entire life in every way possible. I know, there is no love like you have for your kid and blah blah blah but seriously. You know the gig is overwhelming. And that’s what’s so weird! Society makes a big deal about women “choosing” to be child-free (which actually makes a lot of sense for a lot of people) while assuming every woman on the planet is meant to be a mother.
Seems like it should be the opposite, no? Choosing to be a parent is as big and life-altering as it gets and more people should consider the decision as thoughtfully as Cameron Diaz seems to have considered NOT becoming a parent. Frankly, too many people tap dance into parenthood with no clue as to what it’s really all about and then screw it up big time. Screwing parenting up big time means you’re screwing human beings up big time. Human beings the rest of us have to deal with when they go haywire as a result of janky parenting.
The Huffington Post reports Diaz’ decision with an article called Cameron Diaz Says She’s Completely Happy With Her Choice To Be Child-Free. Is it just me or does that strike an almost incredulous tone about Diaz’s decision: Can she really be happy about not having kids? Well or course she is! Or she’d be telling us that she wants kids, wouldn’t she? Anyway, as HuffPo notes, in an interview for the August issue of Esquire, the actress revealed why she chose not to have children. Not that she had to “reveal” why but likely the reporter asked the question because it’s a question any woman over 35 has to field in her lifetime.
It’s so much more work to have children. To have lives besides your own that you are responsible for — I didn’t take that on. That did make things easier for me. A baby — that’s all day, every day for eighteen years. Not having a baby might really make things easier, but that doesn’t make it an easy decision. I like protecting people, but I was never drawn to being a mother. I have it much easier than any of them. That’s just what it is. Doesn’t mean life isn’t sometimes hard. I’m just what I am. I work on what I am. Right now, I think, things are good for me. I’ve done a lot. And I don’t care anymore.
Diaz has previously talked about having kids and, as reported on Babble, said she certainly doesn’t consider herself a spinster or childless. “…one thing I do know is that I’m not childless. I have a ton of children in my life. I can have a kid any second, if I want. All my friends would be like, ‘Sure, come and get them.’ It’s not like I’m the spinster who didn’t have a child. I just didn’t do that in life, and I’m OK with that. I know the choices I made. I know why I made them.”
Hurray for Diaz! Instead of buying into societal pressure that people, specifically women, are somehow less of a woman if motherhood isn’t a part of their plan, Diaz has clearly given parenthood deep thought and realized it isn’t for her. Too bad more people who become parents aren’t giving that decision as much thought.