It’s Monday afternoon and it already feels like Friday. My son spent several hours on the potty this morning watching his iPad, with not as much of a drop of urine hitting the inside of that Thomas the Train bowl. And then he peed on the floor a few minutes after he got up. My daughter has spit up about five or six times — on our Belgian linen duvet cover, all over her cute little gingham red romper, inside her carseat, and all over my blouse. There are eggs stuck to our hardwood kitchen floor and peanut butter clumps on the table. It’s just another day that ends in “y,” and I am fully aware that tomorrow will have some semblance of the movie Groundhog Day.
This is parenting as we know it, and Constance Hall has perfectly packaged up the common mom struggle and tied a little bow around it. In a recent Facebook post that has gone viral with over 45k likes and 4k shares, the Australian blogger reminds us why it is so important to take a break.
“Mums don’t need a break because of the 7 loads of dishes that we have to do a day. Or the piles of clothes that our toddlers demolish immediately after I’ve folded. Or the nights that we don’t even get a solid half hour sleep. Or even the small stain of shit that we didn’t know was smeared on our dress before we leave the house at a failed attempt to adult,” she explains. “We need breaks because of the relentlessness.”
Let’s repeat that. The relentlessness.
The Merriam-Webster Dictionary’s definition of relentless is: showing or promising no abatement of severity, intensity, strength, or pace.
Yep, that word pretty much explains the day-to-day act of parenting in a nutshell. She continues:
“Because knowing that tomorrow there will be 7 more piles of dishes today. Because knowing that tonight, tomorrow night and every night for the foreseeable future … there will be no sleep again. Because knowing that tomorrow if there is not shit smear it will be spew chunks, or a long stream of green snot wiped on my new jumper.”
Like myself, I’m sure Hall wouldn’t trade being a mother for the world. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t thank the gods above (and my husband) for the opportunity to be a stay-at-home mom/writer, because I don’t have to miss a moment of their early childhood. But it doesn’t mean that it’s an emotional cakewalk.
In fact, many days it feels like a losing battle — no matter how much I do, it isn’t enough. I am slowly learning that we just can’t do it all, and that’s okay.
Hall, who was on a three-day getaway with her husband when she posted this on Facebook, has a moral of the story and this is it: we all need time without our children so that we can recharge.
“Mums need breaks so that we can Mum properly. Love properly. Live properly,” she concludes, with the hashtag #mumbreaks and an accompanying photo of herself lounging in a pool with a drink in hand.
It’s just like the lesson we learned as children on the airplane about why mom and dad had to put the oxygen masks on themselves first before “helping others” — if we can’t take care of ourselves, we aren’t going to be able to properly take care of our children.
h/t: Scary MommyMore On