Step 1: Your child tells you they want to be Sofia the First for Halloween … in APRIL. Cool kid. Only five more months to go …
Step 2: In May your child decides that Princess Sofia is totally “last month” and that now she’s more into Princess Elena of Avalor. She’s going to be Princess Elena.
Steps 3-10: Your kid changes their mind about their costume seven more times before September. You finally make them commit to their absolute favorite, order it, and hope and pray that it’s still the same next month.
Step 11: You get an e-mail from the online costume shop saying that they are out of the costume that your child “MUST HAVE”.
Step 12: You peruse the Internet, trying to sell your child on a different *even better costume (*translation: one that can be purchased from the comfort of home while wearing pajamas). “Wouldn’t this one be fun?!” Your child is unimpressed.
Step 13: You brave the brick and mortar costume stores to find the costume of your child’s dreams. No luck … because apparently all the other kids had parents who bought their kids costumes months ago. Ugh. Overachievers.
Step 14: Decide to put on your DIY pants and make your child’s costume this year. Never mind that you can’t sew. That’s what Pinterest is for!
Step 15: Spend the next 48 hours pinning costume ideas that only require a glue gun or duct tape. Also pin lots of pretty lipsticks and boots for fall, because: Pinterest.
Step 16: Lay out all the supplies for your costume DIY during nap time. Just as you are about to dig in and get crafty the kids wake up.
Step 17: You make the mistake of leaving the art supplies out so you can work on it that evening and your child proceeds to “accidentally” spill paint and glitter down your heater vent. When the heat suddenly turns on during dinner, there is a glitter explosion on everyone’s plates from the vent … which just so happened to be next to the dining room table.
Step 18: Clean up the glitter that is literally EVERYWHERE (you even find some in your bra later).
Step 19: Swear off glitter from now until eternity.
Step 20: Get the kids to bed, which involves 87 completely separate steps.
Step 21: Roll up your sleeves and finally get started on your DIY.
Step 22: Accidentally hot glue your fingers together in the process of your DIY project.
Step 23: Realize three glasses of wine in (and at leastthree failed crafting attempts) that DIY projects are not your jam.
Step 24: Cry/have a complete and total meltdown about the glue/feather/rhinestone mess that is your dining room table at 1 AM. Give up and go to bed.
Step 25: It is October 31st and in desperation you open your child’s closet, hopeful that you can pull something together last minute with items they already own. Lo and behold you see last year’s costume hanging in the back. Problem solved.
Step 26: You pat yourself on the back for being so environmentally conscious. Recycle, reduce, reuse and all that.
Step 27: Break the news to your child. (*GULP*)
Step 28: Whining, pouting, yelling (and maybe some gnashing of teeth) about how unfair life is and how this is the worst costume ever.
Step 29: Remind them that is doesn’t really matter what they wear, because they’ll still get tons of candy.
Step 30: Your child instantly changes their tune, because: CANDY. Trick-or-treating commences and buckets of candy are eaten.
Step 31: Start all over again on November 1st, when your child starts talking about what they want to dress up as next year.
Step 32: Start practicing your yoga breathing and buy more wine to get you through the next 364 days of Halloween prep.More On