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This Mom’s Mortifying Tale About the Day Her Son Exposed Her Butt in Starbucks Is Everything

Kids certainly keep life interesting. And by “keep life interesting” I mean embarrass the pants off us. Sometimes, literally.

Mary Katherine Backstrom, a mom of two and writer behind the popular blog Mom Babble, routinely inspires and entertains her social media audience of fellow parents with her sometimes humorous, sometimes heartfelt take on everyday family life. Her latest coffee story does not disappoint.

Her Wednesday status update — about how her young son got his head tangled up in her dress in the Starbucks line — is going viral because … well, come on. That stuff is funny, especially when it’s happening to someone else.

Backstrom opens her Facebook post with a familiar tale to any mama: She’s hangry, in need of caffeine, and describes her son as ready to “bust open any minute with some brand of crazy that I can’t control.”

Hey, we’ve all been there; but when mama needs her coffee, mama NEEDS her coffee.

While Backstrom was in the process of ordering what she calls a “nuclear dose of caffeine,” she started to feel a cool breeze.

On her butt.

I don’t know about you, but Starbucks is not usually the place I want to be when I feel a cool breeze on my butt.

Backstrom, who later shared her tale over on Scary Mommy, too, quickly realized that her son had lifted her dress up over his head and was wearing it like a hat, exposing her “granny panties and dimpled behind for all the world to see.”

AHHHH.

I have to tell you, I was both horrified and monumentally entertained while reading this now-viral Facebook post. I’ve made it past the toddler stage with three kids, and can confidently say that all of them have tried to hide under my skirt at one point or another. But even my own small humans have never actually facilitated the exposure of my own dimpled behind and perpetually unfashionable underpants to strangers in a coffee shop. (I guess I should count my blessing on that one. Thanks, kids.)

But for poor Backstrom, this story only gets more humiliating.

It was at this point that her son’s head got stuck to her butt. Yes, you read that right: Stuck. TO HER BUTT. Backstrom compares it to his head being wrapped up like a lollipop in her dress.

I’ll give you a minute to get the mental picture.

” … my son’s head is literally stuck against my butt,” she continues, “shrink-wrapped like a lollypop, and he’s panicking because he might just die back there and, really: Could there be anything worse?”

Hmmm. Locusts, maybe?

This story does have a happy ending, though. First, she successfully extracted from her skirt and got her coffee. But then, she got quite a surprise when she tried to pay the barista and found out her tab had been covered.

“The man said to tell you ‘he’s a fan,'” the barista told her.

This left Backstrom wondering if the man was a fan of her parenting, her popular blog and Facebook page, or merely a “fan of the family circus that travels around Florida showing the world that no matter how bad your day is, you could always be a mom whose child got stuck in her dress, revealing her behind to a Starbucks.”

Maybe we’ll never know.

But mamas, there are two take-a-aways from this funny and OMG-I’m-so-glad-that-wasn’t-me story — besides maybe making sure you have on nice underpants before you take your child out in public when you’re wearing a dress.

First, never stop believing in the kindness of strangers that will present itself when we least expect it.

And second, no matter how crappy we think our day is, there’s always someone who is struggling more than we are. So next time your kids are displaying circus-worthy behavior when you’re out running errands, just remember they could be exposing your fanny to a room full of people who don’t know you.

Perspective, people.

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