And then your kid is all, “what about a hamster? or a snake? or a monkey? I will totally clean up after it, Moooooooom pleeeeeeeease“?
And then you snap and you’re like “hellz no, kid, you can’t even remember to flush the toilet most of the time.”
Yeah…apparently Justin Bieber doesn’t have that person in his life that says “no.” You know what happens when nobody tells an uber-wealthy teen pop star “no”? Apparently he gets a baby Capuchin monkey, and within hours of owning it, has it confiscated by German authorities.
From the sad tale of Pac the hamster, to the current whereabouts of Mally the monkey, let’s take a look at how Justin Bieber’s pets are doing these days. And of course, the question remains: what pet will Justin Bieber randomly adopt, with zero planning, next? I’m hoping it’s either a Tamagotchi or a Webkinz, because it doesn’t seem like Justin’s life is really conducive to taking care of a living, breathing animal.
Justin Bieber’s Pets 1 of 7
Click the arrows to scroll through!
Sammy the Papillon: Living with Justin’s grandparents 2 of 7
Justin and his parents adopted Sammy from a shelter in Canada in 2010, according to a PETA video he made promoting animal adoption.
Since then, rumors have swirled on a regular basis that Sammy has passed away; fans have even set up Facebook pages mourning the papillon. However, Beliebers in the know report that the dog simply lives with Justin's grandparents in Stratford, Ontario.
(Photo Credit: Twitter)
Bijoux the Papillon: Never mind, that dog was just there to hang with the Biebs that day 3 of 7
In December 2010, the Biebs paired up with peta2, the hip, kid-friendly branch of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA). Justin posed for photos and filmed a public service announcement promoting animal adoption from rescue centers. The papillon in his PSA and his photo shoot for peta2, however, wasn't Sammy. The dog shown is Bijoux, who I guess is just there for the photos?
"It's really important that people adopt," said Justin in the PSA video. "I really encourage going to an animal shelter, or a place where you can get a dog that's been abandoned, or doesn't have a home."
Justin was hailed as one of peta2's "Heroes."
(Photo Credit: peta2)
Baylor the Husky Mix: Living with Selena Gomez 4 of 7
When Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber supposedly adopted an adorable Husky mix puppy together in the fall of 2011, the pop world let out one giant, collective, "Awwwwww."
The thing is, Justin wasn't an adult at the time, so the dog was actually adopted by Selena. Selena kept Baylor when she and Justin split up, and Baylor is still living healthily and happily with Selena, her mom, and five other rescue dogs in Los Angeles.
(Photo Credits: Facebook/Selena Gomez)
Johnson the Boa Constrictor: Auctioned, then placed in a zoo by animal-loving winning bidder 5 of 7
When Justin brought a baby boa constrictor to the 2011 VMAs, the snake seemed more like a prop or an accessory than a pet. Basically, the snake was an excuse for Justin to explain to everyone that his snake was named Johnson. Because, like every single other 17-year-old boy in the whole history of ever, Justin was super-clever with the double-entendres.
Super-props to Access Hollywood reporter Shaun Robinson for keeping her cool and not smacking the crap out of Justin right there on the red carpet when he smugly asked her, "Wanna hold my Johnson?"
When she asked why he'd gotten a snake in the first place, he said, "why not?" Because obviously that's an excellent reason to get a snake that's going to eventually grow up to be six to eight feet long.
Three months later, Justin auctioned the snake off on the charity auction site Charity Buzz, with the proceeds going to Pencils of Promise. The winning bidder, Michael Kronick, donated the snake to Reptile & Amphibian Discovery Zoo in Owatonna, Minn.
"I found it really disgusting that celebrities like Bieber would stoop to a level of using living creatures as a fashion accessory and then so easily discard it," Kronick told E! News.
(Screencaps: Access Hollywood via YouTube)
Pac the Hamster (RIP): Given away to screaming fan after concert 6 of 7
Amidst much Twitter fanfare, Justin adopted a hamster, whom he named Pac, at the end of October, 2012.
Less than two months later, while signing autographs after his performance at Jingle Ball in Atlanta, Justin abruptly thrust the hamster's cage at a screaming fan, who was later identified as 18-year-old Tori McClure. Did Justin give her some extra hamster food, or some cage litter? No, but he did offer the sage advice, "that's all you. You gotta take care of Pac."
Last month, Tori tweeted that Pac had passed away.
(Photo Credit: Justin Bieber/Instagram)
Mally the Capuchin Monkey: Currently in an animal shelter in Munich, Germany 7 of 7
Here's where Justin Bieber's pet ownership story totally jumps the shark. On March 28 of this year, music and film producer Jamal Rashid (aka "Mally Mall") uploaded a photo to Instagram of Justin cuddling with a monkey, with the caption "OG Mally first pic with his pops @JustinBieber."
Mally was seized by German authorities later that same damn day when Justin landed in Munich, and was unable to produce the paperwork necessary to bring Mally into the country. You don't really need to be an international law expert to guess this, but apparently it was news to Justin that there is paperwork involved when you bring a freaking monkey into a country.
This week, Judith Brettmeister, a spokeswoman for the Munich Animal Protection League shelter where the monkey is currently being held, told The Associated Press her office had received two emails from someone claiming to be with Bieber's management company.
The apparent Bieber representative asked that the monkey be removed from the shelter, and instead, be placed in a zoo.
However, no paperwork has been filed as of yet, and time is running out for the Biebs to make a decision. "If by May 17 there is nothing, then he loses ownership of the animal and it becomes the property of the Federal Republic of Germany," Meister said.
Animal shelters in Germany do not euthanize animals, Meister said.
What has PETA had to say about their spokesperson's monkey business?
"Young people often acquire animals without considering the impact or consequences, and Justin Bieber likely had no idea that Mally was a baby, taken away from [his] mother at way too young an age," said a PETA representative. "We trust that he'll do the right thing and pay for Mally to stay in Europe with people who are sensitive to, and familiar with, [his] unique needs."
(Photo Credit: Justin Bieber/Instagram)
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