Jessica “Ill Starve Off the Baby Weight” Alba: Every Pregnant Womans Role Model

Attention pregnant women: Look no further for miracle solutions on how to lose the baby weight after giving birth. Forget what you heard about the calories you will burn breastfeeding. Never mind what you read about eating right and exercising regularly

C-list Hollywood actress Jessica Alba has the solution to that unwanted baby fat: starvation.

That’s right, the Spy Kids 4 (straight to video?) star has announced her intention to starve herself in order to get in shape after her second child is born this month.

And with her announcement, no doubt countless pregnant women are breathing a sigh of relief — someone has come up with a reasonable and effective way to take care of the most pressing postpartum issue: a mom’s reflection in the mirror (forget about the baby let dad or the hired help take care of him or her if you’re too weak to, like, hold or cuddle it). Thanks for your bravery in speaking up about a previously taboo topic, Jessica Alba!

“I have a hard time with portion control, so I have 1,200 calorie meals delivered,” she says in the September issue of Lucky. “But I also work out, so basically I’m starving. It sucks. I drink a lot of water.”

Even better, Alba admits she’s not gym obsessed.

“In the gym, I have like five things to distract me: TV, iPod, magazines. Working partners are good, too, so you can chat and not just drown in your own misery,” Alba says. “Sorry, does that sound bad? I just hate working out.”

Alba, like so many other working moms, is career-oriented, which is probably why she’ll need to focus on her outer appearance, and not her actual health and how that will affect her children presently or in the future. But don’t mistake her for being shortsighted.

“I’ve kept my future in mind,” she said. “I wasn’t going to be a flash in the pan. I want my career to last a long time.”

Starvation yes. Eating and exercise no. Setting a good example for your impressionable kids? – hell no. Got that?

Will you try the Jessica Alba diet to shed your baby weight? And will you actually tell people about it if you do?

Image: Wikipedia

Article Posted 7 years Ago

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