The Best Laid Birth Plans…Monica Bielanko
During the last month of my pregnancy I became fixated, no OBSESSED, with getting a pedicure. I hadn’t been able to see my feet or really even touch them so they were looking and feeling a little haggard. Chipped nail polish, skin the texture of sandpaper, toenails that could kill a man – they were gross.
For some reason I had this little scenario in my head of me pushing as my husband held beautifully manicured feet aloft and helped me count to ten. My feet would be soft, the toenails a lovely shade of red and nurses would think to themselves that I had the prettiest feet they’d ever seen. Even the doctor would comment on my lovely feet.
This little daydream of mine is weird, to be sure. I’m not real particular when it comes to giving birth. I don’t have birth plans preferring instead to go with the flow and keep my fingers crossed for a healthy baby. So it was weird, to say the least, that I became so adamant that I must have beautiful feet for childbirth.
I got the pedicure.
Halfway through labor, in fact, I think Henry was crowning, I noticed that my beautiful feet were covered in those hideous hospital sock booties they issue upon arrival. In between pushes I noted, out loud, that the booties were covering my pedicure. The nurse laughed, the doctor laughed, my husband laughed and so did I. At that moment I could give a rat’s ass about my pedicure. It didn’t matter. Still doesn’t.
I wanted to share that with you to demonstrate how sometimes the best laid birth plans never pan out.
I read so many blogs wherein women have created these massive birth plans that include lighting, music and all sorts of other desires for when they give birth. They become obsessed on “the perfect birth” and whether or not they do this or that…
Here’s the thing, though… A lot of that stuff never works out. All bets are off when it comes to childbirth. For various reasons – either you forget to instigate your plan because you’re too busy HAVING A BABY or an item on your birth plan doesn’t jive with hospital policy – a lot of the items on your birth plan fall by the wayside. It can be a small thing like you wanted a scented candle burning and the hospital doesn’t allow open flames to you were hoping for a vaginal birth and have to undergo an emergency c-section.
You can handle the situation one of two ways. You can flip out and act like J-Lo upon learning someone put cream-colored candles in her dressing room instead of white, or you can go with the flow and know that while it’s good to have goals a healthy baby is all that really matters.
Do you guys have any examples of something you really wanted to have happen during your childbirth that didn’t and ultimately it didn’t really matter because you got your healthy baby?