When More Kids Could Mean More Pain

Should We Add Another?

Should We Add Another?

As I mentioned in my first post here on Babble – I have a big case of “baby fever”. I have three gorgeously healthy kids but there is this tugging in my heart and my brain that someone is missing. It is the type of pounding that I just can’t seem to ignore and hope it will go away.

My husband is well aware of my desire for another child. We talk about it often weekly if not daily we find ourselves in a discussion about where he’s at and where I’m at. He is not ‘there‘ yet but has not shut the door either.

Last night we had another discussion about what adding another child would mean for us.

Our pregnancy history has not been easy and this plays heavily into our decision. With our history of pregnancy loss and my diagnosis of factor v leiden and hormonal deficiencies we have to carefully plan our pregnancies. Even with the precautions in place when we try to conceive, it does not guarantee any ‘safety’ of a healthy full-term pregnancy.

During the talk we had last night, he asked me if we do decide to add another child could I handle another loss. Would I survive anymore pain and grief if history were to repeat itself one or two more time?

That is a realistic question and something I’m really struggling with.  Facing the real possibility of more loss if we want to add to our family is a very real fear.

How do you weigh your odds of loss vs your desire for growing your family?

Related: Pregnancy After Loss: Words of Wisdom from Moms Who Have Been There

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