Why I Can't Read Home Birth Stories

I don’t think it is news to anyone who reads Being Pregnant that I am a big advocate of informed birth choices, including home birth.

Last night I was talking to a friend of mine, and the topic of birth stories came up, and she asked me how I felt about reading home birth stories, especially those women who have had home births after a c-section, or multiple c-sections… something I was originally planning if I ever had a third child.

Clearly my plan for a home birth after two c-sections went out the window, and we all know that in a short week I will be having my third c-section unless a giant miracle occurs and I go into labor on my own and deliver.  As much as I would love to have the experience… I simply don’t see it happening at this point.

But before getting pregnant, I used to love reading these amazing birth stories… triumphant, successful, beautiful, and everything I always dreamed of for the birth of my children. Everything I always wanted to experience. Everything I thought my births would be before even getting pregnant with my oldest son.

Is it jealousy?  I am sure it is… reading about the euphoric experience I know in the back of my head I will never get channels the inner mean girl in me, which is why for my own sanity I have really backed away from reading any home birth stories in the past couple months, especially since I confessed my desire for an accidental home birth… another pipe dream.

I just can’t bring myself to essentially torture myself over it anymore… so once this little girl is out, and I am back to being myself, not a giant hormonal bundle of nerves, I can get back to business as normal!

Are there any specific kind of birth stories you couldn’t read in the months and weeks coming up to your pending birth experience?


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