One of my few “guilty pleasure” television shows is watching ABC’s “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette“. I’ve been watching each season for a few years and as much as I think it’s one of the word’s cheesiest shows, I can’t stop watching.
I don’t think there’s anything natural or normal about “falling in love” this way — dating 16+ people at once and being filmed nearly all the time. I think there’s too much pressure, to much living in a bubble and really, in what real world do normal dates take you halfway across the world doing unusual (and hello, expensive) things? I think that’s why there isn’t the best track-record for those proposals actually making it to a marriage ceremony.
Even with the likeliness not being too high for everlasting love, there are some lessons on love and dating that I’ve learned while watching the two shows. Click through to read 14 love lessons from watching “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette“:
A Good First Impression Matters 1 of 14
You know that awkward moment where the guys or women step out of the limo to make their first introduction? There are some who make a great first impression and others (talking about the guy dressed in full armor) who just don't. That first impression matters and while you can always make a better second one, you may not always get that chance.
Know Your Type 2 of 14
Anyone watching this season of "The Bachelorette" will likely be able to tell that Desire has a "type". She likes guys who are fit, but not overly muscular, a little metro, and can have alot of fun. If you don't know your type, try a few out.
Be Yourself 3 of 14
If you're not yourself, your date can see through it. Be who you really are and don't put on a front because the truth will probably come out eventually. We saw this happen a few times with different Bachelorettes (anyone remember Bently?)
Do It For the Right Reasons 4 of 14
If you're not looking for a long-term thing and you know your date is, that's not the "right reasons". If you're after a man or woman who has a lot of money, that's not the right reason. If we learn anything from watching these shows, this is the biggest tip.
Exercise Together 5 of 14
One common thing I've noticed on both shows is that exercise and competition can be healthy for a relationship. Set up games and adventures and watch your love thrive with your energy.
Laugh Together 6 of 14
No one really likes anyone who takes everything seriously, always. Laughing together is what we saw The Bachelor Sean fall in love with his fiance on his season and it's a theme that's carried through all the seasons.
Don’t Fall For the Bad Boy 7 of 14
They are charming, good with words, and seem to have two different personalities. We've not seen a bad boy get to the final rose ceremony and I think there's a valid reason for that.
Travel and Explore 8 of 14
Okay, we know that the dates set up by the producers of the show are anything but realistic in terms of ability and price, but if you can travel and explore new things -- your love will likely grow.
Clear the Air 9 of 14
Oh the drama on this show! There are times where arguments and disagreements will come into any relationship and from these shows we learn that talking directly clears the air better than just relying on what other's say.
Friend-Zone Does Not Equal Love 10 of 14
If you're on the hunt for "the one", don't settle for the one you just feel most comfortable with. A partner who feels far more like a friend is not a great recipe for long-lasting romantic love.
Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously 11 of 14
Like I said before, people who can't let lose, have fun, or laugh at themselves are not always fun to be around. While it's important to be who you are, if you're not into fun, you're not going to be fun to love.
There’s No Set Time 12 of 14
One of the things that shocks me in this type of show is how quickly people profess their love. We have learned that while some people like to take things slower, others like to share what they're feeling when they're feeling it. There is no "right" timeline for when you should fall in love and it's important to share your true feelings.
Talk About The Future 13 of 14
While you don't want to bring this up too early in your relationship, we've learned that being on the same page as far as future life goals go can be a deal-maker or a deal-breaker. Being truthful in what you want out of your relationship and what you want in the future can help determine if you're meant to be.
Family Opinion and Friend Opinion Holds Weight 14 of 14
On Sean's season we saw that sparkle-girl didn't get along with nearly anyone in the house. Ben on Desire's season was the same and while neither were there to "make friends", there is some weight to how well we get along with other people.
We also saw on Sean's season when me met with Desire's family, her brother did not take to him at all and that could have been one of the reasons he didn't give her the rose. Those around us know us well and sometimes we have to listen to what they say.
:: what have you learned about love from watching these shows? ::
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