7 “Five Minute” Ways to Connect With Your Partner

This week has been quite the whirlwind. Really, every week seems like it is on warp-speed, and I know my life isn’t the only one that seems to be jam-packed with all the things that need to be done. Between my husband’s job, my job, our four kids, school, and house chores — there really isn’t a lot of time for things like alone time or dating. I know these are important parts of healthy relationships, and the fact that I am so busy with things like jobs and children, it becomes even more important for my husband and me to find time to connect.

Our reality right now is that we don’t have time to execute elaborate dates, weekend getaways, or overnight adventures. It won’t always be this way, but it is right now so we have to make the best of it. The good thing is, you don’t need all that time and elaborate planning put in place to connect — all you really need is five minutes here or there.

1. Kiss good morning


You shouldn’t underestimate the power of a kiss first thing in the morning. It doesn’t have to be anything dramatic — just a quick one will do. Starting your day off with that quick peck can help set your day off on the right foot, too. I am not much of a kisser, but that quick morning goodbye kiss from my husband always seems to set a positive tone for the day. It sounds silly, but if we miss a few days of that first kiss, we seem to be a little less on the same page with things.

2. Ask about their day


Ask how their day went and genuinely listen to what they have to say. I am not talking about the generic “how are you” that we get from the stranger who packs our groceries, but real investment in how their day actually went. It’s therapeutic to get all the stresses of your day off your chest and fun to share the weird thing that happened at the office today. Plus, it’s an easy way to connect and feel a part of each others’ lives, even if it’s been forever since you’ve been out.

3. Shower together


Not only will you save time during the morning rush and eliminate the “who should shower with hot water first” fight, you will feel connected even if you don’t say a word.

4. Cuddle in bed


Take advantage of that built-in time to connect each evening and morning and cuddle with your partner more. Experts say that sleeping naked even has some extra benefits that help you feel happier, and hormones from the skin-to-skin contact can boost your health, too. The best thing is you really don’t even have to think about cuddling to experience its positive effects.

5. Enjoy a coffee together


It can be so hard to find time to be alone with your partner, especially when you have so much going on — and we all do. I am finding lately that it’s gotten even harder to find that alone time with my husband; scheduling dates has become a real task. I’ve decided to stop letting that keep us from “dating,” so we do so with a little bit of a twist. If you love coffee (or tea or any drinks really) an easy way to connect with your partner is simply sitting down with your cup of coffee. Turn off the TV, put down your phones and just sit, sip, and talk.

6. Send a love text


It seriously takes like two minutes and it can do so much for your relationship to let your partner know you’re thinking of them. I heard something forever ago — and I don’t know if it’s factually true — but nevertheless it’s true for my relationship. It said that when married people text each other, it’s just functional — i.e. you’re asking when they’re done working, sending a message to pick something up from the grocery store, etc… I found that it was the only way I was talking to my husband and that’s not really connecting, so I started texting random messages letting him know I was thinking of him, and he started doing the same. It’s amazing what that simple “I love you” or “You look beautiful today” text can do for your relationship.

7. Smile across the room


There’s no excuse not to do this one often. Like I said, we’re all crazy busy, and for us with four kids, work, house chores, and home school — our craziness is not going away anytime soon. It’s likely to get more crazy around here and while that’s a totally great crazy, our relationship can sometimes get caught in the noise. A simple smile from across the room, a connection with eye contact and a silent understanding is a simple way to connect and doesn’t even take a minute, but it really can go miles.

:: What are some of the ways you connect with your partner when you don’t have a lot of time? Share in the comments! ::

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Devan is a freelance writer living in Toronto, Ontario with her husband and four kids. Read more from  on Babble and “like” Accustomed Chaos on Facebook!  

Article Posted 3 years Ago

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