ASK KRISTEN: “How do I come out to my son about my new same-sex relationship?”Kristen Howerton
I received the following email from a reader, asking advice on her current life situation:
My son’s dad and I were never married. I got pregnant right out of high-school and I have not been in any kind of serious relationship with anyone since he was born. (aka he has never met anyone I dated) After much soul seeking (and heavy therapy) I realized that I am gay and I just started dating a girl who also has a six year old son and everything is magnificent and lovely and all that jazz.
However, I live in a SUPER tiny highly conservative town and my family are devoted catholics. I know that the reactions to me coming out are going to be filled with mixed emotions and beyond me dealing with those emotions, I am worried about my son. I have mostly kept this relationship quiet but I feel guilty not telling my son that I am in a relationships and hiding such a big part of my life from him but I know in sharing that with him it will un-questionably be shared with his father, grandparents, etc. So here is where I am looking for advice-I feel like anyway I go about this is going to turn out terrible so I am looking for all perspectives.
Here is my advice on how she should proceed with her son, and with her family:
Do you have any advice? How do you think she should tell her son?
If you have a burning parenting, family, or relationship issue that you would like advice on, leave a note in the comment secction!
Awkward-but-legally-necessary legal disclaimer: while I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, no advice should be construed as therapeautic treatment.