Gay Marry Me: We’re on the Right Side of History!

If you have a lot of gay and lesbian friends (and if not, you are missing out on fabulous parties!) your texts last night probably contained elation and news of proposal after proposal.

Let’s all get gay married!

I can’t tell you how gratifying it is to read about the historic victories of election day 2012.

  • Maine, Maryland and Washington: the first states in history to win marriage equality at the ballot.
  • Minnesota: struck down a ban on marriage equality.
  • Wisconsin:  Tammy Baldwin became the first openly gay Senator in the history of the United States.
  • President Obama, the first President in history to support marriage equality earlier this year, has a two-term mandate.


Now, I don’t love the fact that legislators forced my rights to be decided by popular vote. That’s just wrong. But we prevailed. Americans proved they are no longer willing to sit by while their brothers and sisters and teachers and fire fighters and neighbors and children and nephews and the lady who runs the cash register at the bodega at the corner are denied equal rights to the protections of marriage. 

It’s happening. Equality and acceptance are happening in my lifetime. Twenty-five years ago, I didn’t think that was possible. Now, I cry in relief at the headlines. When President Obama said “gay or straight” in affirming everyone’s access to happiness, I surely wept.

I am proud to be gay, and I work to assure young people that what is hard about bias gets better. Increasingly we have evidence that not only does it get better individually, but this country, this entire country, is getting better. USA: we get better.

Today I’m taking a moment to have gratitude for fairness, for hard-working activists, for all the brave people who have come out so that through our presence our needs for rights can no longer be ignored, for all of the allies who have asked themselves to break down their biases or work to separate religious doctrine from policy or make countless other evolutions, for all who have stood by their LGBT friends or the gay people their children might turn out to be. I’m taking a deep breath for all the work still ahead, but I’m also celebrating these victories.

I have a straight friend who has withheld marrying her loooong-term fiance. She wants to get married and they are committed to each other already, but it feels wrong to them to get married before everyone can have the same privilege. Of course LGBT couples have commitment ceremonies, but the protections of marriage and the equal treatment that comes with that institution is another thing altogether. I’m thinking we can start planning her ceremony in the very near future. I’ll be happy to be a bridesmaid when every single person has the chance to be a bride to her bride or her groom. Or groom to his bride or  his groom.

As long as I don’t have to wear a dress. Revolution has to have that perk, too, right? One thing is certain. The receptions will be fabulous, so let’s go ahead and have some champagne today.


Check out some of my other posts on Babble Voices: 

Parents as Gender Warriors

Watching Gay Parents on The New Normal

 Chick-fil-A: Eat, Pray, Love

Coming Out with Anderson and Megan

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Article Posted 4 years Ago

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