For some reason, it seems most people link infidelity to the man and not the woman. But cheating is not only done by men, as women cheat, too (although this YourTango.com article says they do less.) Although men are portrayed as unfaithful in the media, especially in many of the shows on TV, (ahem, Scandal), not all men cheat.
This may not be news to you, and you just may be married to a faithful man. But have you ever thought about why he doesn’t cheat, or why the men who don’t cheat … don’t cheat?
Most men are visual, and our “eye gates,” as my wife calls them, are under a relentless attack by the very provocative and explicit images we are flooded with today. Just over 10 years ago, there was a big fuss over Janet Jackson’s breast being exposed during her “Big Game” performance, but today what we see in music performances, in TV shows, and on the Internet make that incident seems like PBS.
So what enables the non-cheating man to remain faithful in spite of this onslaught? Below are a few reasons men who don’t cheat … don’t cheat.
He sees the big picture. Cheating typically involves a quick moment of pleasure but a lifetime of consequences. Those consequences could be living a lie, being honest but hurting those closest to you, or completely losing the people and relationships that mean the most. Men who don’t cheat step back and realize an fling sounds, looks, and maybe even feels good right now, but later it is going to hurt like nothing else.
He is honorable. A man who doesn’t cheat not only honors his commitment in your relationship, but he honors his word, period. When he says he is going to do something he does all he can to get it done. Once he says it, it is done, finished, and permanent. Or once he says we are exclusive, he means it and won’t go back on it unless the relationship ends.
His commitment is to someone greater than you. When we got married I made a commitment not only to my wife, and in front of our friends and family, but to God. And to me, breaking that commitment does more than damage our marital relationship, it impacts my relationship and commitment with God.
He wants to be in his kids’ lives. Maybe this shouldn’t be a big reason why a man should not cheat, because in marriage the spouse should come first. But this is real. Cheating may lead to divorce, or separation, which means he loses out on being with his kids every single day, and may miss out on being in their lives period. That’s a big loss and enough to keep many men faithful.
He is crazy in love with you. Men have feelings too, and men love hard. Maybe he doesn’t fall in love as quickly, but when he does, you will know he is in love with you. When he is at this point, he only wants to love you better than he loves himself, meet all your needs, and can’t even imagine seeing you hurt, especially due to his actions.
Why do you think men who don’t cheat…don’t cheat?
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