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Translations of Mom Footwear

Image Source: Babble
Image Source: Babble

What type of shoes are you wearing right now? Even if the answer is, “None, because the baby was up four times last night and I haven’t left the house since last Wednesday,” settle down to read about what your shoes say about your mom state of mind. Because the chores can wait, as they usually do.

1. Brown or black flip-flops

You’re strapped for time and it’s spring, summer, or fall. Or winter.

2. Other colored flip-flops

You’re going to the beach.

3. Flip-flops with a wedge heel

You’ve deluded yourself that these can be considered real shoes.

4. Uggs

It’s too cold for flip-flops.

5. Flats

You decided to step it up for baby music class because you want to ask another mom for her phone number.

6. Fashionable boots

You’re going to take an Instagram picture of yourself. Alternately, you will be seeing a friend without kids who always looks put-together and cute.

7. Wedges

Your mom is cleaning out the attic and found these. You remember vaguely seeing something like them in a store window recently and figured they must be back in style.

8. Sneakers

You’re really going to exercise. This week. Or next. Either way, they can hide that you haven’t had a pedicure since 2013.

9. Those weird sneakers with a rounded bottom

You’ve given up on exercising but you heard these things can tone your legs. While you sit on the floor and play Legos. Isn’t science amazing?

10. Strappy sandals

It’s date night! You feel fun and young. Until your sitter says she can only stay for two hours because she has a final tomorrow.

11. Pumps

You’re going back to work and you forgot that heels aren’t de rigueur anymore. When you trip up the stairs carrying the bucket seat into the daycare center, you’ll give them to your younger sister.

12. Slippers

You’ve accepted the fact that changing into pajamas at 6:30 PM is your new normal.

13. Slippers with animal faces

You don’t plan on being intimate with your husband ever again.

14. Socks with rubberized tread marks on the bottom

The hospital gave you these when you gave birth three years ago, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t cute enough for … Oh, just throw these out before you’re tempted to wear them to Target.

Article Posted 2 years Ago

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