17 Hilariously Absurd Plush Toys Your Toddlers Will Never Know They're Missing

Plus uterus
Is a plush womb really necessary in a toddler’s life?

Toy Fair 2013 wrapped up on Feb. 13, and while there were plenty of gems to come out of it — Crayola Photo Mashups and WowPacks, to name a couple — there were other toys that are just not meant for every child (and their parents).

Toddlers should learn about their body and its parts. They should learn their real names and functions. Most people can agree on that.

Can we also agree that they don’t need plush replicas of each body part? I survived my childhood without a stuffed mammary gland and gallbladder; my toddler will, too.

I Heart Guts is a company that specializes in toy body organs. “We like to think of the Guts as what you might find inside a dissected Hello Kitty,” the website says.

The organs are, uh, cute and all. But I’m not explaining to my mother-in-law why her youngest grandchild is carrying around a toy testicle — because I’ll never give her one.

Take a look at the I Heart Guts line (which is available for sale on their website). Just keep in mind, please, that these are persona non grata in my home.

  • Mammary 1 of 17
    "Gland of milk and honey."
  • Ovary 2 of 17
    "Ova achiever."
  • Uterus 3 of 17
    "Womb service"
  • Bladder 4 of 17
    "Urine great hands."
  • Testicle 5 of 17
    "Having a ball."
  • Liver 6 of 17
    "I'm a liver, not a fighter."
  • Lungs 7 of 17
    "I lung rock-n-roll."
  • Spleen 8 of 17
    "Smells like spleen spirit."
  • Stomach 9 of 17
    "I ache for you."
  • Appendix 10 of 17
    "Feel it in your gut."
  • Thyroid 11 of 17
    "Burn, thyroid, burn."
  • Brain 12 of 17
    "Brain power."
  • Intestine + Appendix 13 of 17
    Intestine + Appendix
    "Go with your gut."
  • Kidney 14 of 17
    "When urine love."
  • Pancreas 15 of 17
    "Gimme some sugar."
  • Gallbladder 16 of 17
    "You've got gall."
  • Heart 17 of 17
    "I got the beat."

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Article Posted 3 years Ago
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