For anyone living with a toddler, you know that dinnertime is a daunting task. Forget enjoying a hot meal with the family. It can take more than an hour to get your tot to eat what’s on their plate. Here’s how to get your picky-eating toddler to eat their dinner in just 48 simple steps:
1. Ask your toddler earlier in the day what they would like for dinner.
2. Cook their requested dinner and attempt to hide vegetables within the meal.
3. Refrain from getting angry when your tot comes into the kitchen asking what’s for dinner and then tells you they don’t want that as soon as you open your mouth.
4. Tell them this is going to be the best meal ever as they lay on the ground throwing a tantrum telling you that they didn’t ask for that for dinner.
5. Fix the plates making sure to hide all of the vegetables from your toddler’s sight.
6. Tell your toddler to come sit down for dinner.
7. Set the table.
8. Check the table to see your toddler still isn’t sitting at the table, so tell them again that it’s time to eat.
9. Sit down at the table to find your toddler still isn’t sitting down.
10. Find your toddler playing with blocks on the ground and watch them pick them up to bring them to the table.
11. Tell them that they can’t bring the blocks to dinner and that they can play with them after they eat.
12. Ignore your toddler’s hesitation to eat dinner because it’s not on the plate that they wanted.
13. Tell your tot to start eating.
14. Attempt to start eating your own dinner.
15. Stop eating because your toddler has managed to dissect their dinner with their fingers and found the vegetables that are the size of a pinhead and now refuses to eat.
16. Tell them that those are just sprinkles in their food and they they taste delicious.
17. Excuse your tot from the dinner table because they suddenly have the urge to pee.
18. Rush back to the table to try to eat as much as you can while they are in the bathroom.
19. Get interrupted from dinner yet again because your toddler needs help in the bathroom.
20. Finally get them back to the table and sit down with them only for them to tell you they need more water.
21. Fill up their water cup and tell them to eat.
22. Tell them that they need to eat dinner with their fork and not with their hands.
23. Go get another fork for your tot because they don’t like the color of the one they currently have and won’t eat with it.
24. Tell them to eat.
25. Ignore them when they tell you their tummy hurts.
26. Tell them to eat.
27. Tell them they can have more X as soon as they eat their X.
28. Tell them to eat.
29. Go grab a glass of wine because you can drink that much faster than you can eat your meal.
30. Let the bribing begin.
31. Tell them you bought them a special cookie that is ready for them after they eat their dinner.
32. Refuse to feed them because they are old enough to feed themselves.
33. Tell them to eat dinner.
34. Tell them they either eat or go straight to their room.
35. Pour yourself another glass of wine.
36. Go get the cookie and tell them you are going to enjoy it if they don’t eat their dinner.
37. Start to feed them because you are just tired of asking them to eat.
38. Tell them they only have to eat five more bites.
39. Attempt to get the biggest bite on the fork so that they are getting an adequate amount to eat.
40. Finally have them finish the five bites.
41. Give them a piece of the cookie for eating their dinner.
42. Clear the table and clean their plate.
43. Hear your toddler screaming from the other room to let you know they are hungry.
44. Pour yourself another glass of wine.
45. Put the kids to bed (which requires an entirely new post).
46. Put your dinner in the microwave to attempt to eat a hot meal.
47. Listen to your toddler’s footsteps coming downstairs to tell you they want dinner.
48. Just go ahead and finish the rest of that bottle.More On