Toys of Doom – 10 Toys All Parents Dread!

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With a toddler birthday party coming up in May, I am on the edge of my seat wondering what kind of annoying-as-hell toy I am going to be forced to hide this year.

In years past we have had one of those ball popper lawn mowers, a portable ball pit ,and of course the dreaded Play-doh.

Of course all of these toys are fun, but only in moderation. And by moderation I mean five minutes every…say…three months.

Don’t even try and say you don’t have any toys that drive you up a wall, because we all know there are certain toys our kids just love only they know we hate them that much.

I started asking the readers which toys they hate the most and which have left the most horrid memories fresh in their mind. I’ve compiled a list for your reading misery pleasure!

1. Ball Pit

Whether they are in the local McDonald’s play area or in your own backyard, most parents absolutely dread these germ-infested death traps.

Have you ever tripped on one of those balls? Yeah! Talk about a hazard!

2. Drums

Maybe someone in your family wants your toddler to be the next Travis Barker. Unfortunately, most do not think about including the gift of a giant bottle of Tylenol with the drums to fight the headache they inevitably give you.

3. Anything Elmo

He He He! That Tickles!
He He He! That Tickles!
He He He! That Tickles!
How many times can mom hear that adorable high pitched voice before losing her shit? Go ahead! Try her!

4. Toy Lawn Mower

My oldest got this for Christmas when he was a toddler. Every time I would get a child to sleep, someone decided it was lawn mower time…in the living room! That summer it went outside and NEVER came back in.

5. Anything With Batteries

Batteries are the bane of my existence. I swear that my home is single-handedly killing the planet one toy at a time. I try to cut back as much as I can but everything needs a battery the size of my head these days! Reader Chelsea F hates them just as much as I do.

6. Musical Instruments

A few months ago, I was trying to get my extremely cranky and sick baby to bed when my 2-year-old decided he was Bob Dylan’s tambourine man. Thankfully I contained his solo to his bedroom before he could wake her up!

7. Anything Barney

Don’t you just love that big purple dinosaur who has been haunting toddlers since I was a kid? Jessica P. hates Barney almost as much as my toddler does!

8. Play-Doh

We all know the hazards, but we have been playing with it since we were kids ourselves!

9. Corn Popper

Yes, it is called a corn popper, although its noise is far more obnoxious than the sound of corn popping. This has to be the No. 1 toy virtually every reader hated. The sound of it just goes straight through your ears!

10. Toy Guitar

Lori described toy guitars as one of the loudest and most obnoxious toddler toys in history. I would probably say I have to agree! Electronically heavy rock…yeah, I’ll pass.



Article Posted 6 years Ago

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